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Tuesday, May 24, 2011

IT'S MURDER!!!!!


It all started last night --- the kind of night where fog and smoke and memories of love gone wrong and double crosses all jumble and merge and swirl around you.... and you can't shake the blues any more than you can shrug off cheap perfume.


Sher, a dame with an eye for danger and a body to match, was fed up. Fed up with guys who didn't know how to treat a dame right..


There was only one thing that would make her feel better. It was what she had to do.


Call it destiny.


Call it karma.


Call it fate.


Call it a trip to the last Blockbusters in town.. Quick, down and dirty, bargains. The Going Out Of Biz sale. You might call it the Big Sleep of videoland.

The Mercedes rolled quietly into the parking space.  Sher parked and slid out like a panther moving through the night. Then she tossed her golden mane and headed straight for what she wanted.. Her stiletto heels clicked on the sidewalk like staccato gunfire.


She pushed the glass door open with a quick jerk.  The bald guy behind the counter who'd been napping knew trouble had just walked through the door... dame trouble. Tall blonde trouble, to be exact. His eyelids flew open like shades in a two-bit hotel that won't stay down..


" Listen up and listen good," the blonde snapped. "You know what I'm here for. "

"M.... mmmm.. murder?" the little guy wheezed, a bead of sweat glowing on his upper lip.  


The blonde nodded. 


"You might as well sing like a mockingbird and spill the beans," she said, bending over to smooth her stockings.


She straightened up and shot him a look. He knew this doll meant business.


Deadly business.




The little guy pointed, finger shaking, at a section at the back. He knew what she had come for… Classic movies.


The kind that spit out murder and mayhem in a package of hazy gray seduction and smoky bedroom eyes....

Yes, darlings, today I’m  dishing up some fave lines from those flicks filled with murderous twists and snits.  To paraphrase the opening line of "Roxie Hart" (l942),  this bloody blog  "is dedicated to all the beautiful women in the world who have shot their husbands full of holes out of pique."

So listen up. And listen good.


Double Indemnity (l944):
"Then there was the case of a guy who was found shot. His wife said he was cleaning a gun and his stomach got in the way. All she collected was a three-to-ten stretch in Tohatchapee.”--- Fred MacMurray
“Perhaps it was worth it to her.” --- Barbara Stanwyck





The Strange Love Of Martha Ivers ( l946):
"Now, Sam.  Do it now. Set me free. Set both of us free. He fell down the stairs and fractured his skull --- that's how he died. Everybody knows what a heavy drinker he was. Oh, Sam! It can be so easy." --- Barbara Stanwyck giving it everything she has ( and then some)  to convince lover Van Heflin to do in hubby Kirk Douglas.


They Drive by Night (l940):
“The doors made me do it." --- Ida Lupino ( who was NOT talking about a certain l960s rock group),  confessing to suffocating her husband by closing (those bossy) garage doors on him.


Libeled Lady (l936):
"Gladys, do you want me to kill myself!?" --- Spencer Tracy  
"... Did you change your insurance?" --- Jean Harlow


Adam's Rib (l949):  
"And after you shot him, how did you feel then?" --- Katharine Hepburn
"Hungry." --- Judy Holliday


"I loved you, Walter, and I hated him.   But I wasn't going to do anything about it. Not until I met you. You planned the whole thing. I only wanted him dead." --- Barbara Stanwyck again… artfully blaming  the driven-to-murder-by-lust Fred MacMurray in "Double Indemnity" ( 1944)


"Good-bye, baby." --- Fred MacMurray, before shooting Barbara Stanwyck in  ( you guessed it!) "Double Indemnity”.


That's all for now, darlings.. by the way, kiddo.. are you on the lam? Just make sure you sneak right  back here soon for a  brand new Brazen Hussy blog....


In the meantime , go out there and do something so BRAZEN people gasp, "Now THAT's  a dame I wouldn't want to cross --- with anything except ropes of  diamonds and pearls..."


And, if you need a baaaaad dame fix, check out  Double Indemnity (murder doesn't get any sexier than this...as Stanwyck spins her sensuous web... and Fred MacMurray falls heavier than a dead man with his feet in cement..)

3 comments:

  1. I'm scared to death, but curious enough to become your first follower - not stalker...please don't crack me across the skull with those stilettos..!

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  2. Add me to the list! This stuff is great!

    ReplyDelete